by KnowPhuket
Over the last decade, the number of mixed Thai-Western marriages on the
Thai island of Phuket has exploded. What is behind this
phenomenon?
Here on the beautiful island of Phuket in Thailand, there are a great
number of mixed Thai-Western marriages. It really is turning into quite
a phenomenon. Around Phuket's schools and playgrounds it is common to
see mixed-race children happily playing with the 100% Thai kids. They
are usually easy to spot with fairer skin, western features and
non-black hair. A whole generation of culturally diverse,
multi-lingual children is growing up and will soon be quite an asset to
Phuket's tourist industry.
This phenomenon of mixed marriages in Phuket has really exploded over
the last decade. Of course, the major reason is the expansion of
Phuket's tourist trade. When you have more than a million western
visitors a year, it is natural that some of them will meet and fall in
love with local people. Especially when the local people are so
appealing.
But there must be more to it than that. The tourist resorts around the
Mediterranean, Caribbean and US also receive millions of foreign
visitors a year. There are mixed-nationality marriages at these resorts
but not thousands in a small area like there are in Phuket.
One thing stands out when you look at Phuket's ex-pat population -the
vast majority of us are men. Probably around 90% of the ex-pat
population is male. That is not the case when you look at the breakdown
of tourist visitors where the split is only 60-40 in favour of males.
So while there are many women visiting Thailand, only a small
percentage of them decide to settle here. It is probably a similar
percentage to those that settle at other holiday resorts. But the men
are marrying Thai women and settling here in numbers that way exceed
what is typical elsewhere. There is an obvious conclusion to draw.
There are a lot of men coming to Phuket to actively seek wives. They
are not just falling in love while on holiday - they are coming with
the pre-planned intent of finding a doe-eyed Thai beauty to be their
spouse.
Many men seem to be dissatisfied with their experiences of women in
their home country. Society has changed rapidly in the west over the
last few decades. Women have become more confident and assertive. They
can be intimidating to approach and fast with a withering put-down.
They are much more demanding in their relationships and expect a lot of
concessions from their partners.Many men do not like it. They still
want the fifties ideal of a feminine, doting wife.
So they come to Thailand in search of the answer to their problem.
Here, they believe they can still find women who are beautiful,
feminine and attentive to their husband's needs.
It is dangerous to generalise too much about the men who marry Thai
girls and settle in Phuket. They all have their own story. Just the
same, there are common patterns. You can place a lot of these men into
three broad groups:
Group 1. There are those that come to Phuket for 'normal' reasons
such as work or a break from work. It is natural that some of these
people will meet and fall in love with locals. This happens all over
the world. There is no doubt that Thai women are very charming so
perhaps it is more common here than elsewhere.
Group 2. Then there are those who fall in love with their
bargirl. The girls who work in the sex industry are good at selling
themselves; it is their job. It is not usually the hardened
sex-tourists that fall for their charms. They tend to pick up a new
girl every night with no emotional attachment. It is the new guys. The
men who come to Phuket for the first time, not quite knowing what to
expect. They probably have an idea that they are going to pick up a
prostitute but they don't know how it works. They end up doing the GFE
(girl friend experience). That is picking up a bar girl and then
keeping her for the entire length of the holiday. They act as if they
are boyfriend-girlfriend. The girl gets plenty of time to weave her
magic. She tugs the guy's heartstrings with her life story until he is
brimming with sympathy. She gives him lots of affection and by the end
of his holiday, he is in love. (see
http://www.knowphuket.com/naughtynightlife.htm for more info).
Group 3. Then there are those who come with the pre-planned
intent of finding a wife. They have thought about it and come to the
reasoned conclusion that a Thai wife would make their life better. Some
of these guys will look for their new wife around the sex venues of
Patong. Others want to stay away from the sex industry girls. They may
try dating agencies or Internet matching services. Some of them will
try to meet 'good' Thai women away from the tourist resorts. Their
approaches may vary but the conclusion is the same - they think a life
in Phuket with a Thai wife would be better than their current life back
home.
Whatever the reasons, the mixed Thai-Western marriage is now an
established part of Phuket's scenery. Not all of these Western men find
their dream wife. Many of these marriages run into problems but that is
true of marriages the world over. There can be extra problems related
to marriages between people from different cultures. Still a lot of
western men are very happy with their choice.
About the Author
The author has lived in Phuket, Thailand for seven years. If you want
to read more about the colourful island of Phuket then please visit
http://www.knowphuket.com where you will find more articles and visitor
information.